Ever notice how clearing your physical space somehow clears your mind too? I've discovered that each phase of letting go in my minimalist journey corresponds directly with moments of mental breakthrough and healing.
Earlier this year in Chicago, I finally confronted the dresses I'd bought in Europe - the same ones I wore during the most traumatic period of my life in Romania. These weren't just any dresses; they were the ones I wore while experiencing the darkest, most difficult moments I've ever faced. I'd been carrying them from place to place in my suitcase, and each time I looked at them, those painful memories would surface. Letting them go wasn't just about creating more space in my minimal life - it was about freeing my mind from the physical reminders of that trauma. Sometimes minimalism isn't just about having less; it's about choosing not to carry your trauma with you in physical form.
People who know me often say, "Oh my god, I could never live like that, I could never live on so little." But here's what's funny - the more things I have, the more unwell I feel mentally. The less I have, the more free I feel, both physically and emotionally.
It's interesting because I love fashion. I love really nice shoes, structured leather handbags - not tons of them, but the few I have are special to me. I always tell people if I had a ton of money, I'd probably be just like Tracee Ellis Ross - dressing eccentrically, being myself, dressing for how I feel rather than to impress others.
But that's evolved significantly over the past seven to eight years. I've moved toward more of a uniform style, and while people used to make fun of me for that switch, it wasn't random. The change started before I moved to Europe - I had this dream of backpacking, of traveling to 50-100 countries. I figured to do that, I needed to travel light.
Now, this week, I'm facing another layer of letting go. Looking at my small suitcase - the same size as my 17-inch backpack - I know there's still more I can release. I have electronics I haven't used in months, cables that connect to devices I no longer own, clothes that haven't seen daylight in over a year, and an excess of bras and shirts that I keep "just in case." Even with such a small amount of possessions, I've managed to hold onto things I don't truly need.
And then there's my storage unit in New York City. What I thought was just furniture and basics turned out to be a collection of electronics, hardware, shoes, and clothes holding onto past versions of myself. Bright, colorful pieces that don't match who I am now, both in style and in spirit.
Each move has been an exercise in letting go - Germany in 2018, Romania, back to the United States, Chicago, New York. Each time, I thought I'd reached my minimalist peak. Yet here I am, ready to peel back another layer.
The truth is, even as a minimalist, I sometimes trauma bond with things. No one's perfect. These past two weeks, I've been dreading another round of letting go because I'll be moving from house to house, couch surfing in different places. You can't do that with bags of stuff, no matter how much you wish you could.
I'm starting to see how my mental clarity around the environments I'm in, how I want to be treated and loved and cared for, has a strong correlation to my possessions. Each item I hold onto or let go of is a reflection of what I'm willing to accept in my life.
This week isn't just about decluttering - it's about honest evaluation and creating space for what's next. Each electronic device, every unused cable, all those unworn clothes - they represent decisions about who I want to be and how I want to live. It's time to take a deep breath, maybe after a walk, and face these items one by one.
This journey never really ends - this constant checking in with yourself, reassessing what you truly need. But that's the beauty of it. As I prepare to find my next living space, I'm actually excited about this new phase of letting go. There's something liberating about carrying only what truly serves your present and future, not your past. Each item released creates more space for possibilities, for growth, for whatever beautiful experiences await.
Some questions for you:
- What new chapters might open up in your life with a little letting go?
- What things in your life - physical or emotional - might be ready to be released?
